Another Birthday in Absentia 

01 Nov

Today, November 2nd,  is the date of Bethany’s 23rd birthday. I have nothing to give her except maybe a moment of recognition – of remembrance. The hour of her birth was recorded one hour and one minute after the hour of her brother’s. I’m not sure what significance that holds, if any at all, but it’s a detail I’ve always held onto.

The doctor who delivered Cole, delivered Bethany. The nurse who assisted with Cole’s birth, assisted with Bethany’s. That meant a lot to me. The nurse was actually assisting another patient and saw my name on the labor & delivery whiteboard and traded patients in order to be my nurse. I felt as if these were gifts God gave to David and I. Maybe a gift to the doctor and nurse too – it’s no fun to help a mother deliver their stillborn child. Medical professionals carry wounds too. So I like to think God overlaid a bad experience with a good one for all of us.

Bethany was named Bethany Joy, but I later wished we’d hyphenated her name. A good family friend bought her a sippy cup with her name and it’s meaning when she was very young. Bethany was not excited to learn that Bethany means ‘House of poverty.’ I liked to tease that the full meaning of her name then was,’House of poverty and joy.’ If her name held true she would be joyfully poor. Much better than bitterly poor!

Bethany was a sophomore at the University of Central Arkansas (UCA) in Conway at the time of her death. It was a long time later when I heard that the school paper published an article about her death. It was even longer, on the second anniversary of her burial in fact, when I actually saw the article. 

So on Bethany’s third birthday in Heaven, here is the article her school paper published (keep scrolling down to read the article):


Posted by on November 1, 2016 in Grief


Tags: ,

4 responses to “Another Birthday in Absentia 

  1. Nancy

    November 2, 2016 at 7:30 am

    I feel your pain with you. A difficult day for your whole family in a lot of ways. Hugs and Prayers for you and your family.


  2. Monica Del Carmen Herrera

    November 2, 2016 at 6:31 pm

    Dear Bethany Joy maybe I never meet you but for sure you was a light and joy in the life of many I can wait the day Jesus returns or take me home and meet you . Sometimes I think all the things God allowed that year for our faith family was necessary for everyone stop and think about our journey here. I still here isn’t easy but I surrender my will to Him and I know you and your sister always watching over your parents and sister here may the supernatural peace of God filled their hearts the years to come and they can share with us their experience to be closed to God and his Will.
    Happy birthday in Heaven.


  3. victoriawhyte

    November 10, 2016 at 1:31 am

    Bethany is so pretty and the tribute to her is beautiful. Birthdays are one of those days when we miss them the most 💔


    • Janet Boxx

      November 10, 2016 at 7:25 am

      Yes, birthdays and holidays are particularly hard!



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: